Tanner's Turning 5

Tanner turns 5 on Sunday- even though his Nana made him promise that he would stay 4. Even though I keep telling him to stop growing up so fast. He is so excited for his birthday. He invited five friends from preschool (sorry…. PreK) and his only request was a “baseball cake”. He has been counting down for weeks now, using our calendar in the kitchen to keep track of how many days remain until the big day.

He has grown up so much this year: Suddenly he is a really good artist and loves to draw pictures of our family, including Milo. Suddenly he is adding numbers and showing a big interest and talent for math. Suddenly he is sounding out words in books. Suddenly he is more social, talking more to his friends at school and not hiding when we run into playmates at the Merc or on the green. He looks older, too. And taller.

He is still so sweet to his sister. Tonight he and Faith got out of the hot tub before the rest of us and they went inside and he helped her get her jammies on the right way and by the time we came inside he and Faith were in their jammies with their books picked out for bedtime. Another time today I “caught him” teaching Faith how to properly take off her turtleneck. He is really patient with her and so loving.

He and Jake also get along phenomenally well I think. Sure they can get at each other, but overall they play together really well. Lately they spend their mornings (they can’t wake us up until 730) doing word searches together in their room.

He is still a LOVE. He crawls into my lap and wraps his arms around me all the time and tells me I am the best mommy in the world and how much he loves me. He is really good at building with legos, playing baseball (he can’t wait for T-ball to start in March), catching and throwing the football, coloring/drawing, riding his bike, and playing all sorts of make believe. He has two bears that he sleeps with (Chocolate and Vanilla) and he cuddles them up whenever he is tired or hurt or sleepy.

He still really enjoys school and going to Miss Wendy’s house. He is a really good sport. When we play family games he rolls with the punches and I have never seen him throw a fit or get mad when he loses a round of Candyland, Old Maid, Bingo, Chutes and Ladders, or any other game.

He got to be "special person" this week at pre-k. We made up a poster of photos and some of his drawings and wrote captions together for the photos and pictures. We got to go to class today and watch his special person presentation. He stood up in front of the class and explained his poster and each one of the photos, then the class sang him the "special person" song. Then he called each classmate up and they said one thing they liked about him and each gave him a hug. He was much more talkable this year than last, but was still clearly uneasy being the center of attention.

He is a really easy going guy and I am so proud of the little boy he is turning into. Happy Birthday to my Tan Man, Tanner Pants, Gooeys, and Baby Boy. I love you more than you know.

Lesson Learned?

Jake has trouble controlling his anger sometimes. When he gets mad he tends to slam doors, hit things (not people, luckily), stomp around the house, and yell. We are working on it- but man it is so hard to teach someone how to handle anger. I mean, how do you get the message across that it is OK- really OK- to feel the emotion of anger but also curtail their “acting out” in anger without conveying the message that anger really ISN’T Ok? Does anyone out there know what I mean? What are appropriate ways to show anger? Is it OK to hit things? Well, not people obviously, but what about THINGS? Pillows? OK. Wall? Probably not. Bed? OK. Couch and other furniture? Probably not. What about yelling? Is it OK to yell? That’s what a lot of adults do when they are angry- and certainly an example he has seen modeled in our household, so why is yelling not OK? And if it’s not OK, then what is the consequence? Ugh. This parenting thing is rough. I sure wish I had received the manual that came with the baby and maybe the future therapy bills wouldn’t be so high. But I feel like this week we did something right:

The other day Jake anxiously called me up to his room. He was really worried to show me something up there. Turns out he had slammed his door into the wall and the doorknob had left a big dent in the drywall. He felt so bad about it and was scared to tell us about it. But he did tell us. So, we told him that was what happens when you slam the door, and that is why we kept telling him it wasn’t OK to do when he was angry. We let it go at that- for the time being.

When Sunday rolled around, in the middle of the AM football game, we turned off the game and announced to Jake that he needed to go get $6.00 out of his bank because we were going to Home Depot to buy supplies to fix the wall. He was flabbergasted and a small fit ensued. He couldn’t believe we were not only making him pay for the materials but were also making him buy the supplies himself IN THE MIDDLE OF A FOOTBALL GAME!! Jake also has a couple of misperceptions about justice in the Alan household. One of his favorites when we impose a new rules or consequence is to say, "No fair, you never said that before", or, "you have to give me a warning first" as if we can forsee each argument or all bad behavior in the future and have a plan laid out to deal with it. He also likes to say, "No, I don't agree to that deal" when a new punishment is imposed, like the child rearing is a democracy or something.

So, he and Brian traveled to Home Depot , Jake paid for the materials, brought them home and learned how to fix a hole in drywall. I think he may have learned something about consequences for his actions and taking responsibility for bad decisions.

Will he be slamming his door again? Probably. I am not naïve and we’ve got a lot of years ahead of us here. But hopefully he will remember the disappointment of missing football this week and having to use his money on something other than toys/candy. Hopefully he got to feel the satisfaction that comes from righting a wrong, taking responsibility for his actions, and doing the right thing. Hopefully.

P90X

Marisa mentioned P90X in a recent post so I wanted to do some followup. We're are both doing it and are almost done with the first 90 days (which is amazing in it's own right). We are enjoying it and it's tough, but there's plenty of opinions on the internet for you to find out the specifics of it if you're interested (also on late night TV).

I had to post this video of Faith. We do the workouts at all hours of the day and take over the TV room. Normally we try to do it while the kids are at school as we both work from home most days now, but that doesn't work on the weekends, and sometimes we can't fit it in until after the kids get home. We are quite the spectacle as we jump, run, lift weights and sweat, and the children have all jumped in at various times to get their "workouts" in. This day, Faith jumped in with Marisa on the Kenpo Karate workout. It was pretty cute.....

Giants World Series Champions!

YES!

Halloween 2010

The only one of the kids that picked a costume in September and stuck with it was Jake: a football player. A Boise State football player to be exact. For the third year in a row to be more exact. Can we say "obsessed"??? Tanner was going to be Simba from Lion King, a costume he and I found at a garage sale this summer. Faith was going to be a princess- another costume found at a garage sale. Then the Halloween Box came down from the attic and they were presented with all sorts of options from years past: a fireman, a horse, Super Girl, Superman, the "thing", etc... After trying them all on multiple times over the course of the month the day actually arrived and Faith decided to be Supergirl. Tanner decided to be a fireman, but when he saw his big brother dressed up with the shoulder pads and football pants, he quickly changed his mind and decided to be a football player, too. Luckily we already had the pads and another jersey. We're nothing if not prepared!

We started the festivities with a spontaneous trip to Krispy Creme for Halloween treats to have while carving the pumpkins. We hopped in the car in our sweats and let the kids pick out two donuts each. The Halloween themed pumpkin donuts and the black and orange sprinkled ones were quite a hit! At home we carved the pumpkins then watched Scared Shrekless together. The night before I had dried out the pumpkin seeds and sauteed them in butter and garlic salt for a World Series snack. Yum.... just as good as I remember them being as a kid!

Around 5 Jake's friend Sean came over- his mom and I are friends so we decided to trick-or-treat together. We had pizza beforehand, then got the kids dressed in their respective costumes. The boys were very handsome in their football gear and Faith looked adorable in her supergirl outfit- Even Jake commented on it. After posing for the traditional front porch photo op, we hit the streets. Faith was on fire- she ran down the sidewalk (with her "Phoebe" run- if you used to watch Friends then you know what that looks like) trying to keep up with the big kids.

After the first few houses of not being sure if they were saying their "thank yous" we instituted a rule: we have to hear you say "Thank you" from the curb. From then on out they were all properly polite and we had several homeowners comment on how nice it was to hear the gratitude. Sometimes I think we are too hard on them with regards to politeness but I hope it pays off and sticks with them in the long run- and no one seemed any worse for the wear by being held accountable to that standard, even on Halloween Night :)

Faith got tired after about 40 minutes so Brian took her home where she proceeded to hand out candy- but only to people that weren't too scary looking. Brian had to do those. We stayed out until 730 then hurried home to dump out the candy and watch the Giants game which we had recorded. We turned out all the lights and watched in our bed- family style- until 845 when we put the kids to bed.

The kids are all so big this year, it made me realize how (relatively) few Halloweens we have left in which we all go together from house to house. Soon Jake will want to go just with his friends and Mom and Dad will be a thing from the past. I am not a big Halloween fan overall- I don't like to dress up, don't like Halloween parties, etc... but the kids excitement last night was contagious. I loved watching them have such a great time trick-or-treating. And it didn't hurt that the Giants won, too! Happy Halloween everyone!

Giants Fever

I don't know how we will handle the series- I mean my children were basically parentless for the last few weeks. Dinner? Oh, yeah... that thing that I hastily throw on a plate or pick up from a drive thru prior to first pitch? You mean kids can't live on chicken nuggets and pizza alone? You mean PB and J and yogurt five days a week will not help my kids grow up healthy and strong? Faith and Tanner have learned more about playing alone and taking care of themselves through this playoff season than ever before. Legos have been in wide use, as have coloring and multiple viewings (which for them are more like "acting outs") of The Lion King upstairs in our bedroom (thank goodness for two TV's). For the playoff series my mom sent the kids five dollars each to use at the Merc during the games- that helped keep them entertained for a little bit for each game and I have to say, the sight of Jake holding Faith and Tanner's hands across the street and helping them pick out treats makes me so happy!

The tension of Game 6 nearly killed Brian and I- the kids were in bed (we gave them the choice to stay up for Saturday or Sunday's game and they picked Sunday). Game six was SO GREAT! We were unable to sit down for several innings- jumping around like a crazy person, hopping from foot to foot watching Brian Wilson pitch (OK, so it was only me that was actually hopping around). I was sure one of us would have a heart attack. Oh my gosh we have had so much fun. We spend the games texting with our fellow Giant fans- Sheila and Wayne- our friends we went to spring training with this year. When they won in game 6 Brian looked at me and said, "What the hell will we do with Tanner and Faith for the next series? We're gonna have to buy them a monkey or something!"

We received a box in the mail from Auntie Sue

yesterday filled with Giants gear: a Posey shirt for

Tanner, Lincecum for Jake, Cain for me, Faith got an AT & T ballpark shirt, and Brian got Uribe. All the kids also got sweatshirts. Between that and the flag that we bought after the playoffs, we were good to go! The boys immediately put on their shirts, headed out back and played "pitcher,catcher" in their appropriate roles. Brian's shirt must have been good luck since Uribe hit a home run in the first game. I saved my Cain shirt until game 2 when he pitched an amazing game. Thanks, Auntie Sue, for thinking of us, and also for bringing the Giants such good luck! The next day we got a box in the mail from Grandma Mary. Man, are we spoiled!!! Inside we found the traditional ballpark treat: Cracker Jacks. Also money for a hot dog or pizza dinner for one of the games. Really... this has just been TOO MUCH FUN.

Although Tanner and Faith don't watch all the games with us, they are very into the series. When giving them a bath before the game on Wedn

esday I heard them from the other room saying, "Fear the Beard! Fear the Beard!". When I walked into their bathroom I saw that they had both covered their chins with bubbles and were chanting for our favorite closer: Brian Wilson.

World Series Game 3 tonight. Already got dinner planned and made: turkey and cheese sandwiches with an apple, cheese stick, juice box, and animal crackers (so what if it was sold to me in a little plastic lunch box already made at Walmart... I figure it's better than a happy meal. GO GIANTS!

Fall

I don't know what is up with the weather this year here (other than global warming), but fall is finally starting to show up. This is a picture pretty much out our front door. The leaves are turning finally.

It's has gotten crisper in the mornings. Sweatshirts and sweaters have been broken out and the "Grandma Mary blankets" are back in heavy rotation while we watch the Giant's playoff games. We have the kids signed up for ski and snowboard lessons and are taking the boat in to be winterized next week (we hardly knew ye this year), so we're not preparing for hibernation, but close. If Marisa would just let it go about the amount of football we're watching on Sundays it would be perfect....

Goodbye Football!

Jake's last game was Saturday, followed by his team party. His first football season was a great experience in so many ways. I think Jake learned a lot more than just football plays and blocking positions. He had a coach that pushed him in a way he hasn't been pushed before- not at home, not at school, and not in any other sport he has participated in so far. This was hard at first (and created some controversy between the coach and parents) . Yes, the coach demanded respect and good attention during practice and often doled out "laps" and "pushups" for sloppy play or inattention, but he was also encouraging and kind and found the best in each player. He talked to them after each game about what they did well and what they could have done better, he inspired them to do their best by promising he would do push ups for good plays or getting a guy's flags or whatever- and he always kept true to his promise (one day he had to do 60 pushups). Any injuries were treated with patience and kindness. At the year end party he spoke about each boy personally- his strengths, what he had improved on, what he saw for him in the future in the sport, etc... It WAS hard at first to watch Jake be pushed by his coach. But in the end he is a better guy for it. He has learned some amazing life lessons- lessons that will bode well for him in his real life, too, not just on the football field.

I am reading an excellent book right now called "Free Range Kids" in which the author talks about all the ways that kids today are given less responsibility, less independence, less trust to make good decisions while also taking less of the natural consequences for making decisions that result in bad outcomes (moms and dads tend to rescue kids a lot more these days in ways that don't teach kids to take responsibility for their actions). The book is fascinating and challenges parents to let go, worry less, and trust their kids more. Anyway, this book coincides perfectly to what I experienced as a parent in football this season: I had to let go- of my desire for Jake to always feel comfortable and let him experience the pain of loss, a bad game, and an injury here and there without my immediate support. I left that to Coach. After practices 1 and 2 Jake wanted to quit. It was so much harder, more intense than any other activity he had been involved with. There really wasn't a lot of "hand holding" or coddling in the beginning. He stuck it out and had what he says is his best sports experience ever. Was it hard for me to see him go through periods when he was bummed out about a bad play or pissed off that he had to do 20 push ups during a practice? Sure it was. It is so hard as a parent to see your kid struggle. But seeing him struggle and in the end persevere is huge. It has made me a better mother and Jake a better person.

Sillybandz

Why couldn't I have been the person who invented these? There's no advanced education or science background involved and this person, I'm sure, now owns some island in the Bahamas or something.

Jake came home pretty soon after school started with some sillybandz, they trade them at school and all his friends have them. It's pretty funny at the beginning of football practice to see all the boys run over to their parents on the sidelines to take off their sillybandz as coach won't allow them on the field. But since Jake liked them, of course Tanner and Faith had to have them also.

As they were in such high demand, Mom and Dad seized the opportunity to use them as bribes for behavior at bedtime. We still, to this day, seven years after the fact, have trauma at bedtime. This blog could have just as easily been called, "Bedtime Struggles" for all of the stories, plans, and gray hairs that we have shared with everyone here. But, since they do have to go to bed every-night, we continue to fight for ways to make it easier. So Dad went to the store a couple of weeks ago and bought a bunch of sillybandz. We put them in a big jar on our counter and if the kids go to bed without issues and sleep in until 6:30 in the morning they get a sillyband.

Jake has gotten a bunch and trades them with his buddies at school and with Tanner as well. Tanner has gotten just as many as Jake, but can only seem to be able to find two or three at any given time. Faith loves them and clamors for them every morning that she has earned them. She wears them for about 7o seconds or so before taking them off and leaving them somewhere, at which point Dad picks them up and puts them back in the jar.

So far these seem to be one of our better bedtime currencies and we've got a whole jar full to go, so hopefully they will continue to be popular for awhile so we can continue to stay sane.

Tanner-style

Tanner has really started to come into his own in pre-k this year. He seems more confident (a big step for him) and has just started to seem "older". The other day he came home and asked me to cut his hair (since both kids are clients of Dad-the-Barber these days). He was very specific as to how he wanted it, I asked Marisa first and she agreed. So here's his cut. He was very happy with it and asked for it to be spiked up. My middle son, a spirit like no other.

Fall 2010

It's been a great season so far: Giants in the playoffs and Boise State is continuing to kick butt. The weather has turned, leaves have fallen, Halloween decorations are up. The costumes have been picked out (Jake- football player, Tanner-Simba or a football player or a fireman, Faith- horse or princess). I love fall- probably for the same reasons I love spring: everything is changing and showing the promise of something new (in this case, the promise of winter and snow and cold weather, I guess!). For a girl that has never been at one with "change" I do love the changing seasons!

The Giants in the playoffs has been huge fun for us. Last week we had to go watch the Padres/Giants final game at a sports bar since Direct TV wasn't showing it. Luckily we had

a babysitter all lined up (it was supposed to be date night anyway). We had a great time watching games 1 and 2 of the series between Atlanta and the Giants last week- even though they lost the second one and it was way too late for us to be awake on a work night (We are 10 o'Clock people and the3 1130 nearly killed us. In fact, I kept falling asleep on commercial breaks in the 10th and 11th innings and Brian had to keep waking me up!). Today's game was a little tricky: a 230 game on a Sunday afternoon. It was gorgeous outside so we bookended the game with a family walk and a family bike ride. Keeping the kids entertained during the actual game was another matter. They did a pretty good job of keeping themselves entertained and I only felt mildly guilty about leaving them to their own devices for 3.5 hours. But at one point I actually gave Jake and Tanner a 10 dollar bill and sent them to the Merc to buy whatever they wanted. Seriously. They came back with gummies and ice cream and snickers bars and lemonheads- which we divvied up between all five of us in the 7th inning. MMmmmmmmm a healthy dinner for us all! Lucky I didn't have cans of silly string or spray paint handy or it could have gotten really messy. (Note: the next morning the boys came down dressed for school in the exact clothes that they were wearing during yesterday's game. Even down to the undies. This in support of another Giants win tonight. Should I make them change? Or be proud of them for this bit of Giants fanatical thinking?)

Last weekend I took Tanner and Faith

to the Scarecrow Festival downtown at the Botanical Garden. They had a great time looking at all the different scarecrows. We got to vote for our top 3 choices and all of us put the Monkey one as #1. They also got to pick out pumpkins and take a hay ride. Fun stuff. So, fall continues. Once Halloween arrives it is a slippery slope to the New Year so we are definitely trying to enjoy the calm before the storm!

And, of course.... GO GIANTS!! Get us a win tonight!

Hogle Zoo

It may be stereotypical, but while the boys all went to the Dew Tour Faith and I opted for a girl's day at the Zoo. The week leading up to the trip she was so excited about the fact that she and I were going to get to spend the day together, just the two of us. She had been telling Wendy and her brothers and anyone that would listen that she was going to the zoo on Saturday all by herself with Mom. I was pretty excited, too.

It was so great to have the one-on-one time together. We did the zoo at her pace and went to see the things SHE wanted to see and do the things that SHE wanted to do without having to compromise on anything. She loved the baby elephant and its mama, liked the bird show and was amazed by the talking yellow parrot, rode the merry go round and the Zoo Train, and got to pick out a special souvenir from the zoo store. This last event took a good 45 minutes. She just could not decide between the stamp kit of zoo animals and a pink stuffed elephant with buggy eyes. She finally decided on the stuffed elephant (no big surprise there for me....). We stopped for lunch and headed back to the hotel for a much needed nap for both of us!

She is so much fun to hang out with. She still loves The Lion King and can quote LONG sections

of the movie verbatim and with the exact inflection from the show. She has one soliloquy that we just have to get on video. We checked out a Lion King book from the library the other day and she notices every inconsistency and points them out to me. As "girlie" as she is, she's also starting to copy her brothers wannabe skater talk and saying things like, "Hey, yo yo!" and wanting to ride her scooter and bike with them out front and around the block. She is dressed today for the Boise State game in a too big t-shirt and is intent on carrying the Boise State flag we have and cheering for the team- even though she has very little interest in the actual game!

My little girl- already 3 1/2 years old. I am cherishing this time I have with her.

Do the Dew (tour)

Mainly because of video games (on the Wii, DS and iPod touch) Jake and Tanner are really big skateboarding fans. They both ride their boards out front but are anything but death defying so it's not from actual skateboarding that they got this obsession. Anyway, the Mountain Dew Action Sports Tour is on TV in our house on Saturday afternoons and the boys both really like to watch all the action sports, from skateboarding to BMX to wakeboarding to snowmobiling. They are also big fans of the X-Games on ESPN.

The Dew Tour makes a yearly stop in Salt Lake City. This year we had a friend who works for one of the sponsors who was able to score us some tickets and vendor passes, so we hooked up with their family and all went down for the weekend. We pulled the kids out of school 1/2 day on Friday and drove down to Utah Friday afternoon. We got in just in time for dinner and to get settled into our hotel. The next morning the boys and I headed down the street (we were within walking distance) while Marisa and Faith (having no desire to see the skateboarders and BMX'ers, headed to the zoo).

We met up with our friends and walked down to the event center together. Jake and his best friend Tyler were very excited to see it all. We went and watched the Gatorade Rising Stars skateboard park finals in the morning and walked around the festival village for a while. Tanner really wanted to see the BMX finals, which involved standing in a very long line and sitting for a very long time in the sun, but was very cool. They were running behind and the guys were taking a lot of warmup runs, which to Tanner were as good as the contest itself, because after the 2nd run that actually counted he said, "Dad, can we be done now?". So we left and walked back to the hotel and met up with Marisa and Faith for family nap time.

After naps, Jake and I went back for the skateboard finals while Tanner, Marisa and Faith hit the pool. Jake was really excited for the finals and knew most of the guys competing so he was a lot of fun to watch it with. The event started at 5:00 (again, long line, hot sun) and we had to leave at 6:15 to meet up with everyone for dinner but it was a really good competition and he and I had a good time.

Downtown was packed. Finding dinner was a little bit of a challenge (and to be fair at that point after a full day in the hot sun, my patience was a bit low and I had had enough of "little skater punks" to last me for a good long while), and what in the hell is up with that downtown "grid" street numbering system? How you are supposed to know where you are and how to get from one point to another is a mystery to me. Anyway, I was ready to get back to the room and rest. We got some food for the kids and Marisa and I had room service while watching Notre Dame lose to Michigan State with the kids.

We got up and had a great breakfast in the morning and got out of town and drove back home. It was a really fun trip but I am looking forward to some downtime (such as it is in our house) over the next couple of weeks to recharge and get ready for fall. I'll be ready for the Dew Tour again next year maybe and we're going to try to get down for a Jazz game this season, so we'll be back again soon.

Dog Days of Summer

Philip and Joan joined us from London for the weekend. The kids loved seeing them- even Faith ran right up to Grandpa and immediately gave him a hug and told him her joke (Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn't PEELING good!). I was pretty impressed that at age 3 she could remember and retell a joke and get thepunchline right! They were all very loving toward both Phil and Joan. Tanner wanted to wear his t-shirt from the Clearlake family vacation and show Phil all the pictures from the reunion last year. Jake was excited that they would get to see him play quarterback in his football game on Saturday. Joan and Phil were great sports with all of our chaos and seasonal focus on football.

Friday night they took us all out to Chili's for dinner and then to the Capital High football game at Boise State on the "Smurf turf". This was Joan's first ever football game and I think she really enjoyed it! We all got into the action. We got to see Karly (our daycare provider's daughter) play in the marching band at halftime and our neighbor play corner back. Good, wholesome, "small town" fun!

The next day brought more football- and more drama then we had anticipated- for Jake's game in

Mountain Home. He had been practicing hard for two weeks for his turn at quarterback and he was really excited and a little nervous. Mountain Home is about an hour away so he kept referring to it as his first "travel game" which I guess he felt was really cool. Anyway, Brian and Jake took Joan and Phil early while I took the little ones to swim lessons. We picked up donuts for the team then met them at the field.

When we got there Jake and Brian were off on the sidelines, Jake obviously upset. Another parent told me that Jake had gotten slammed (hard!) during warm ups and had a bloody nose, fat lip, cut gums, and a loose front tooth. So.... I went over to them to see what was up. Brian was doing his best to talk him through it but sometimes a boy just needs his Mom. Next came probably one of my hardest parenting decisions to date (and, yes, I know they will continue to get harder): Jake was crying and crying and was obviously hurt. He said he wanted to go home and he didn't want to play that day. There was blood all over his shorts and shirt. Now, the mommy in me wanted to take him in my arms and take him home and let him cry it out. But I knew that in 30 min. he would be feeling better and would feel crappy that he hadn't played in the game. So...... I swallowed the "mommy" in me and summoned the "hard ass" in me. "No. We are not going home. You can do this. You can play. Show them what you are made of". I basically told him that he would be letting his team down and, more importantly he would be letting himself down if he didn't try. That I knew he was hurt but that I also knew he could do this. I'm not joking when I say I had to try not to cry. With a little help from his coach (and some children's Advil) we got him pumped up enough to give a few plays a try. I knew that once he got out there he would be fine (at least I was pretty sure, but also knew that it could cost me millions in emotional therapy later on).

My heart did swell with pride as I watched him run out on the field with his teammates. He got out there and tried his best. All I cared about at that point was that he got out there! The team killed them in the end, but the donuts seemed to help what little disappointment the boys had in losing! Afterwards the team went to Wendy's together. He was so excited that he had played QB. That night in bed I told him how that had felt for me- how I didn't know if I should have pushed him to play or I should have let him go home. I told him that it was really hard to make that kind of decision as a parent but that I did what I thought was best, even if it was hard. He looked at me, bless his heart, and said, "Don't worry, Mom. You did the right thing. I am really glad I played. I would have been so mad at myself if I had given up.". Whew... dodged another bullet I guess. It honestly had me rattled the rest of that day, though.

That night we all watched Rudy (thought we'd continue in the football theme of the visit) which everyone loved. Faith, of course, retired to our room to watch Lion King for the 3000th time. Sunday was beautiful so we spent a lot of the day by the pool. Faith made a new friend and wowed us with her ability to talk to anyone. She walked right up to a little girl and asked her name and how old she was and if she would like to play with her. They played for the better part of an hour in the pool. Later in the afternoon Faith came up to me on my pool chair and asked me if she could invite Ruby over for a play date. I said sure, thinking I would call the parents in a week or two. Nope, Faith had other ideas. She walked right over to Ruby's father (in a pool chair on the other side of the pool) and asked him herself. Too funny. She went back to the pool and told Tanner, "Now I have friends, too!".

We had a really nice visit with Brian's dad and Joan. It is too bad that we only get to see them once a year. We hope to make a trip to London to see them in a few years- maybe when Faith is Jake's age or so. The kids were sad to see them go.

This weekend we are off to SLC to see the Dew Tour and visit the zoo. Never a dull moment here in the Alan household!

End of Baseball, Beginning of Football

This weekend was heaven for sports fans. Notre Dame on Saturday, Giants on Sunday, and then to top it all off the BIG Boise State vs. Virginia Tech game on Monday. We also managed to fit in a trip to the pool, a bike ride, swim lessons, work outs (we are both doing P90X- I'm only on day 7), and a trip out to look for football pads for the boys Halloween costumes. Ahhhhh....I wish they all were three day weekends!

Before the Giants game on Sunday evening Tanner ran upstairs and came down dressed in all of his Giants paraphenalia- including a pillow and blanket, hat, and fuzzy sweats. It was so funny because he just randomly disappeared for a few minutes and then reappeared- a vision in Orange and Black. They won, of course, capitalizing on the Padres 10 game losing streak.

What can I say about the Boise State nail biter...... it

was much anticipated and hyped and it lived up to its promise. It was one of the best football games I have ever watched. Who needs an NFL team when you've got Boise State? We had

friends over and the kids all played their own game at halftime in the dwindling light of late summer. Blue and Orange is so big here, you can't help but get caught up in the fever. We were all decked out in our Boise State gear- even Tanner's monkey who has his own Broncos football uniform. We ordered in pizza and let everyone stay up too late for a school night. We knew we would pay for it on Tuesday but we couldn't let them miss it- and it came down to the last minute so there was no going to bed early! It was so much fun. National Championships HERE WE COME!

My Wish For You

In starting this new year and thinking about what I want for you three (and feeling nostalgic and like the years are passing too quickly )these song lyrics say it all. It may be trite but it is exactly what I want for each of you in this life. I hope when you read this years and years from now that this wish has come true-

"My Wish"

I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

Faith Wilder Olivia Alan- August 2010

My baby started preschool yesterday. There were no tears shed- either by her or by me- but I am pretty sure I was the one closest. She was so excited! She had been talking for days about getting to wear her new dress, new panties, new socks, and new shoes and going to the red school. She woke up and wanted to go immediately. Unfortunately preschool doesn't start at 7AM- we had to wait until 9AM with her asking every five minutes if it was time to go yet. When we got there she walkedright in, signed in (moved her clothespin from her name to the bucket), gave us a quick hug, and ran straight to the paint easel. No looking back for that girl. Brian had a chance to watch her for part of the time from afar and saw her riding the trike and trying to jump rope with her teachers. When we picked her up she was full of excitement and details about her day. We took her for her special lunch at the Merc to debrief and she was so tired she practically fell asleep in her Mac and Cheese. When I woke up this morning to take Tanner to pre-K she was very sad that it wasn't a preschool day for her and says she can't wait until she gets to go again tomorrow.

She continues to be a lover of art- coloring, playdoh, painting, etc... She has taken to wanting me

to draw very specific things for her, most recently a baby giraffe. Uh..... if anyone has ever seen my artistic side you know that a baby giraffe is not in my repetoire. She also likes to draw flowers and people. She loves Legos (also wanting to build baby giraffes) and is really very creative. It looks like she is going to be left handed- she definitely favors that side when drawing or writing. She throws the same with both hands- not particularly well with either one! But, really, despite our best efforts to include her in all the sports the boys do, throwing and catching is not her favorite thing to do and she often wanders off to do something else so it is not like she has had a ton of practice!

She is much more girly than I had anticipated. I don't

get where they get it from- it must be in the blood- but this girl is getting into Princess stuff- despite the fact that the only princess thing she has ever owned is her princess towel! She already picked out her Halloween costume at a garage sale last weekend: a princess dress. Now she wants a tiara and princess shoes to go with it. She likes to read the Pinklicicious books and play house and horsies (also not my forte) and she has about a million stuffed animals which she calls her "guys". She loves to sing. The other day we watched her surreptitiously as she sat at the table coloring and singing some sort of jazz version of Twinkle, Twinkle. It was completely made up in the moment and was hysterical to listen to her do it. As soon as she noticed us listening, though, she stopped. No repeat performance. She loves music and, of course, wants an iPod like her brothers have.

She loves Jake and still calls him her "Jakey" and has to get a hug and kiss each day before he leaves for school or football practice. She and Tanner are two peas in a pod. On good days they can play together for long stretches- acting out Lion King, doing playdoh, etc.. but on bad days they argue like an old married couple. In any case, she is a very lucky little girl to have two such doting big brothers.

She is definitely 3. She is in a whiny stage and we are working really hard at recognizing what a whine is and then turning those words into a nicer tone of voice. She gets tired and cranky if she doesn't nap, but if she naps more than half an hour she can't get to sleep at night. It's a little tricky these days! She still has crazy hair- all curls that tend to grow out instead of down. They get snarled minutes after they are brushed and she ends up looking a bit like a ragamuffin a lot of days. She is just such a funny girl- I literally want to love her up. When she woke up her first day of preschool she gave me a big hug and I said, "Faith, you need to stop growing! How did you get old enough to go to preschool?" and she said, "Mommy, I can't stop growing. I want to be big like you!". I know it's going to happen but, in the words of Trace Adkins - I'm gonna miss this....

Tanner Jackson Alan (August 2010)

Tanner is very excited to be in pre-kindergarten this year. And be sure if you see him not to call it "preschool". That would not be accurate. He is in PRE KINDERGARTEN and is VERY proud of that fact. His little sister is in preschool- that's for babies. He's in the big kid class now!

He started today. He, too, had picked out a first day of school outfit that consisted of a t-shirt and gym shorts. In his case the gym shorts were too big and had to be folded over to avoid showing his little booty to his classmates. He is a bit more apt to pick out "fancy" clothes than his big brother is, and will sometimes even ask me if he can "dress up" on any given day. Still, when we took our annual trek to Target to pick out BTS clothes, he ended up with the typical uniform of my boys. He was very excited for school to start again. I think he really missed it over the summer. He has three teachers this year due to his large class size and he loves them all, though he says Miss Rachel is his favorite. We didn't know how he would react at drop off today- last year he cried quite a bit and though he was enthusiastic this year, we worried when push came to shove that he would be emotional. But, nope. He did great. Signed his name (traced it, actually) and walked right in to the art table.

After school we picked him up and took him to his First Day of School Lunch at the Merc. Just the three of us. Good times. I love when we get that "two on one" time. Getting him to tell us about school is like pulling teeth, often getting "I don't know" to all of our questions. Today he was a little more forthcoming: He played with Gus outside on the bikes, he made a picture frame that is blue with decorations, and he read a book about dinosaurs jumping on the bed. He was tuckered out at the end of the day and fell asleep immediately.

Tanner is so funny these days. Still my little love. Still loves to cuddle and snuggle and tell me how much he loves me and how I am the "best mommy ever". And, yes, I eat it up. He has been really into building with Legos lately and everyday at Miss Wendy's shows me his latest creations. Last week it was an entire zoo with all type of animals in cages. He still plays so well with Faith. Those two are so close. One of Brian and I's greatest hopes is that their special relationship continues into adolescence and adulthood. Ever since Las Vegas he has been really into The Lion King. He and Faith want to watch it all the time and I often let them because they are so cute acting out all of the scenes. They assign parts to each other and then literally act out every scene as it is happening. He also has taken to acting the part of a "skater dude" and puts up his peace fingers and says things like, "Peace y'all, Dude!" and "Peace y'all, Woman!". I can't help but crack up.

While he still gets naughty when he is overtired and can try our patience with his acting out, he is really well behaved and so, so, so polite and respectful. He's the one that when I serve dinner will say, "Thank you, Mom, for this great dinner!" and things like that. He is starting to perceive inequity in every situation and sees unfairness everywhere he looks. "But why does JAKE get to stay up later than me?" and "I NEVER get to do XYZ!!". My poor middle child.

This little guy has my heart on a string. Mama's Boy, for sure.

Football Opening Weekend

When we got back from our Tahoe vacation, we had missed the Football Team Parent Meeting, and really didn't get to de-brief the information with any of the other families. The coach sent us the docs in an email with the practice schedule, fundraising info, league philosophy and the field parking rules. We read thru them all and kind of laughed off the latter as there were diagrams and overflow lots that were serviced with shuttles, we just figured it was just being overly hyped and it wouldn't be that big a deal once we got started on the season.

Well the first game of the season was this weekend and boy were we wrong. Game days are run run like a well olied machine, with overflow parking lots (which we parked in....the correct one based on our field designation for Saturday) and the shuttle bus (which we rode to the field and back with about 20 other people each way). The parking lot at the field was so full that there were cars lining the medians, all of the side streets as well as the cemetary parking lot up on the bluff that overlooks the field. There was also a line of tow trucks about ten deep towing cars that were parked where they weren't supposed to be, so off the the proper overflow lot we went.

Come to find out that team come from 1-2 hours away to play games at this field (we have a road trip to Mountain Home in a couple of weeks which is three hours round trip ourselves) so it would have made a little more sense. Also, if we had stopped and done the math we would have known as well; there are 16 fields that each host one game per hour for seven hours on Saturdays. So, there are roughly 112 games going on at this field over the course of a Saturday. Add in concession staff, parents, siblings, cheerleaders and this little park is a madhouse on game day.

However, as I said before it is VERY well run and we had a great time both soaking in the atmosphere and watching Jake's game. They won 12-6 and Jake did great. He made a few tackles, broke up a few passes and saved a touchdown by chasing a breakaway ALLLLLL the way down the field and getting the guy before he could get into the endzone. He never gave up, did what he was supposed to do and was where he was supposed to be. The most important this was he had a blast. He loves his team and coaches and really has fun playing.

Jake- August 2010

Jake started 2nd grade this week. I thought it might be time for a kid update.... Tanner and Faith will get their own posts on their first day of pre-K and preschool (respectively).

My eldest son is turning into a football freak. Besides playing and loving Optimist Youth and watching games with Brian often (who knew that preseason football was so big???) he also is going to do a Fantasy league- the draft is this Friday. Boise State starts the year ranked #3 in the nation and a huge game is coming up against Virgina Tech next week, which we will all be glued to on ABC. It is hard not to get sucked into Football Fever here with the blue and orange adorning every car and body in the Boise area. We also are planning on several Capitol High games this fall. Fun, fun, fun!!!

Jake came home from his first day of school full of excitement about his teacher, Mr. Conant. He is a very well liked and well respected teacher at Hidden Springs and we were excited that Jake was in his class. Jake loves that he is in class with his best friend, Tyler, and a couple of his new football buddies. Mr. Conant definitely makes school fun and the year is sure to be a good one. He is excited to learn multiplication and to continue writing stories in writers workshop. My only goal for him this year is that he continue to enjoy school, work hard when he is there, and respect his teachers/classmates. So many parents here are so concerned about "challenge" for their kids, but both Brian and I feel that right now the challenge level is just fine- he is learning, he is happy, and he is well liked by the adults/kids. I'll take that combination for as long as we can get it!

He is riding his scooter to school with friends this year. No more family walks to school in the AM. Yes, it is a little sad, but it was time. He meets two of his buddies at the Merc next door and rides with them, then meets them at the end of the day and rides home. How did he get old enough to do this??? I have to admit, I wanted to follow him the first day to be sure he stopped at the intersections and looked both ways. Letting go is hard to do.

Picking out school supplies this year was pretty funny because my "too cool for school" guy had to have everything in BLACK. Black notebooks, black folders, black pencil sharpener, etc... His first day of school outfit was, once again, exercise shorts and a skateboard t-shirt. I am afraid he will never be the "plaid shorts and nice collared shirt" kind of guy and only wears that type of thing for VERY special occasions and only when Brian and I insist.

Besides football Jake also continues to love basketball and baseball and has started being more interested in building with Legos (mostly due to Tanner and Faith's involvement in this) and also in making "experiments". His latest was in trying to create a slingshot out of a rubber band bracelet, playdoh, and popsicle sticks. He still likes skateboarding and riding his bike and claims he wants to be in the X Games someday- even though "dare devil" has never been his middle name! He is excited to take snowboarding lessons this winter, too.

He is still challenging to us, emotionally. He is so sensitive and gets over tired so easily. He can still throw massive tantrums that outshine those of his brother and sister by the nth degree. He is much better at bedtime but still needs about a thousand lights on and the door wide open or he is terrified. (Hmmmm- as I type that I realize that my family might very well have described me that exact way, too, well past adolescence! Uh-oh.) Still, he is such a love, so sensitive to other people's needs, and even though he won't let me hold his hand at school any more (sob, sob), he loves to cuddle up with me when we are at home, we still sing songs together each night, and he hasn't started showing any signs of "body embarassment" yet.

He will be 7 1/2 years old Sept. 17th and, in short, I am so proud of him and challenged by him everyday.

End of Summer Blues (Brothers)

Our Hidden Springs "End of Summer" concert was last night at the Village Green. Our cellophane wrapped sandwiches, made by Fred Meyer, were put to shame by our neighbors spreads of kabobs and homemade salads, but we enjoyed our bottle of wine and the music and the fact that the kids are mostly old enough to play alone while we relax and talk to friends. There was a bouncy house and a balloon animal guy to keep them entertained, as well as plenty of friends to toss the football around with. The music was good- Blues Brothers- and the kids all danced and played until after 9. It was kind of a "last hurrah" as my work gets crazy tomorrow and the kids start school this week.

Football Jamboree 2010

Jake started football a few weeks ago. This will be his first year of flag football as seven is the first year you can sign up to play. It's thru the Optimist Club here, which is less intense than Pop Warner (which we would have had in CA), but waaay more intense than the Y-leagues and LIttle League we have played so far. They have had two weeks of practices, four days a week + games. Once school starts they go down to three practices, one scrimmage and one game. It's a seven week league (plus two weeks of training camp) so it's a commitment to say the least.

Marisa had her trepidations about it at first, the coach is a tough guy with a flat-top haircut that makes the kids do pushups and windsprints if they jump offsides etc. I tried to explain that it would be good for him in the long run and I think she's starting to see it.

Jake had his opening day today, at the BSU Broncos stadium. They took photos and played a short game against another team. It was packed, there are 76 flag teams and double that for tackle teams and they all were there today. They lost their short game but I think they will make fast progress now that they've seen what it's like.

Jake started the season as cornerback on defense, so we have been working on that. His coaches are really impressed with his ability to catch and throw as well and his knowledge of the game. They would have started him on offense if he were a little bigger. Most of the offensive guys played last year and are in third grade this year, so they are a little bigger and faster. They are switching after the second game, so Jake will get to play on offense after a few weeks.

The games are on Saturdays at the football complex down the hill from our house. It's so crazy there during games that they have two satellite parking lots down the street and run shuttles back and forth. We're also looking to get back into going to some Capital High Football games again this season. They start next week, so fall is coming on fast.

Jake is excited for the start of football in general and the first game next week. He has loved football so far and is really looking forward to the season.

Tahoe Top Ten

Our family vacation to Tahoe was a whirlwind of activity. Here are some of the highlights:

10.Paddle boarding

We rented a paddle board at the public beach at Tahoe Donner one day. I watched Brian attempt it first and he made it look a lot harder than it is. Turned out it was not user error in his case but too heavy of a body on too light of a (waterlogged) board. Still, I was not prepared for how easy it is and how relaxing. I would have liked to stay out on it for hours, but sadly we had only rented it for one hour and everyone wanted a go at it. I hear there are yoga classes that take place on these boards now. Guess what I will be googling next...

9. Squaw Valley Mini Golf

We went to Squaw earlier in the week to do the Astro Jump thing and listen to live music for Blues Night and while we were there the kids were enthralled with the mini-golf course that winds through the village. So, on our second to last night in Tahoe we surprised the kids and took them back to Squaw for some mini-golf. They were so excited. I thought they would tire of it after a few holes, especially Faith, but they played all 18 holes, running from one green to the next together while Brian and I took turns watching them and window shopping. Tanner's playing looked a lot like hockey and Faith didn't quite get which way the putter should be held but they all had a great time. Afterwards we let the boys stay for a few minutes of the outdoor movie (Transformers) while I took an hysterical Faith back to the car. She was sobbing because she had seen a little dinosaur in a store that she wanted. After finally crying herself out on my lap in the front seat of the Suburban (saying, "I want the dinosaur! He was so little and cute!" about 100 times) we rejoined the boys and took off before Transformers caused any nightmares.

8. Scheels Sporting Goods

One of the coolest stores I've ever been in. Seriously. It is huge and has stuff for the kids to do

throughout: a ferris wheel in the center of the store, interactive football/baseball/basketball game, full size race cars to play in, a jungle gym/slide thingy, and more. Brian and Jake had been there alone earlier in the week and they convinced me to go back again with the Tanner and Faith along. Luckily we got out of there without losing the shirt off our backs- just got some new shoes for the three kids a backpack for Brian and a summer hat for me. It is

definitely a destination in and of itself!

7. Disco Fever

Probably the most fun I had all trip was when we went down to the Clubhouse where the

playground/pool is located. We had planned to just be there while Mom and Suzie were prepping dinner, but then realized that there was going to be a 70's cover band playing that evening, along with a jumpy house, cotton candy/face painting, etc.... So we called back up the house and had Mom and Suzie put away the dinner for another night and ordered pizza and snacks at the little restaurant there instead. Everyone danced- Faith and I started out dancing to "My Girl" and "Joy to the World", then went back to get everyone else. That's when the real fun began: Watching the four kids dance to Brick House and dancing ourselves through several great songs from the 70's. Good times with good friends. Nothing better.

6. Sand Harbor Beach

The last afternoon in Tahoe we went to Sand

Harbor beach. It was a beautiful beach in and of itself- a long expanse of sand that looked more like an ocean beach than a lake. We chose to go to the cove since it was shallow and surrounded

by boulders and a great place for the kids to play and swim. After watching some teenagers jump off a large boulder several hundred yards away, Brian decided to give it a try. The kids and Mom and I watched as he swam out, climbed the rocks, and jumped. After swimming back he convinced me to do it with him. The picture is one that a fellow jumper took of us before we jumped. Never underestimate the power of a good adrenaline rush. I need to do stuff like that

more often! Too fun. The kids made sand castles and Jake swam, while Mom and I enjoyed a glass of wine. Mom treated us all to dinner at the little outside cafe at the beach, followed by ice cream cones for everyone. It was the perfect way to end our vacation.

4. Rafting the Truckee River

Rafting the river is somewhat of a tradition in our family. Brian and I

went several years in arow before we had kids, took Jake when he was a year old, Tanner when he was about 18 months, and finally we were able to take Faith. We did the Truckee Rafting Company and Faith was so excited that we got to ride on a bus to the start of the trip. Seriously, I think that may have been her favorite part of the day! Mom joined us and all in all it was a mellow ride down the river. The kids took turns "helping" Brian and I paddle and we even got to stop for ice cream at one bend in the river where a very savvy Ice Cream Truck Man had set up shop. The end of the ride got a little squirrelly and Tanner was scared (as was Mom) but all arrived safely and we headed to a shady table at River Ranch for drinks and nachos. Everyone slept well that afternoon during "Family Nap" (see #1 below).

3. Pony Rides

We took Jake to Alpine Meadows Ranch to ride a horse when he was about Faith's age so this year we took Tanner and Faith. It is a nice little stable and they put the kids on the horses then let the parents lead them around this pretty forest/meadow area. It was Tanner's first horse ride and Faith's second. Tanner was a little nervous at first but ended up really enjoying it. Faith, of course, loved the horse and was very confident- even though her horse was an actual horse, and a pretty big one, too, not a pony!

2. Bingo Night

Lots of people came out for Monday Night Bingo at the Donner Clubhouse. We ordered food there, let the kids play on the playground, and played 90 minutes of Bingo. Faith tired of it pretty quickly but Tanner and Jake were gung-ho. Tanner is pretty psyched that he can recognize the numbers and letters easily now and Jake really wanted to win a prize, of course. It is kind of addicting- even Brian and I got in to it!

1. Family Naps and Reading Time

Each day had a nap involved in some way, shape, or form. Most days it was Family Nap in the back bedroom with the kids on the floor and Brian and I on the bed. You know that peaceful feeling in a warm room in the middle of the day with the sunshine streaming in and nothing you need to do or worry about? Yeah... that's what Family Nap was like (well, after we got through Jake's few minute fit that accompanied our announcement of Family Nap each day...). The kids were so tired after the long drive, being out in the sun, all the activity, staying up later than normal, etc... One day we just put them all in the car and they slept while we drove and listened to music. Whatever it takes, right? We also got lots of reading time in, which was great! I have read like crazy this summer but my "books I want to read" are still piling up! And they keep publishing new ones each day :) We are both definitely in the "summer reading" mode- nothing too serious or time consuming or thought provoking- just plain old entertainment.